I'm bottling up so much-

I need to scream until I get all of this air out of my lungs..


Or I'll explode with every deep breath I have to take.

Instrumental music-

The soundtrack to my soul.
The beat of the drum, the beat of my heart.
All feels the same to me.

I feel the words being sang, but I don't hear a thing.
Every note, and sound.. being understood, as if I've been there. Done that.
Retelling a story that's played in my head a thousand times over.

These lyrical notes say more than a million words, as they are felt through my bones.
Saying more than I've ever read, and more that's ever been written down.

You are a ticking time bomb-

A switch blade, a gun ready to be shot.
All useful in self defense..
But all self destructive when aimed wrong.

You are so extreme.
So impressionable.
So ready to tear anyone/everyone apart.

You must think of the most terrible things to say, everyday..
Arguing, degrading, bad mouthing has become your art.

Recieving end-

There isn't a day that goes by that I don't think about you.

That I don't miss you will every fiber of my being.

I'm waiting for someone to come to my bed,

Telling me to wake up.

Because it's only a dream.

I don't know if you can hear my thoughts,

or the words that fall from my lips in desperation

as I mutter prayers to one I'm not sure is listening.

I'd send you a message in this empty bottle I drank dry, 

if I knew you were at the other end of the vast blue eternity.

I'll never be able to forgive my friendship, or lack thereof.

But I hope you can find it in yourself, your spirit, your being.

Whatever you are, where ever you are, now.

I hope what I believe is true.

I hope you can see me, even though we can't see you.

I hope my life is being documented, so you can read my intentions.

Chapter 118 verse 20; the intention of never loosing you.

You're in my heart, as the blood are in my veins.

If actions were  as good as words, I'd wish I had more to say.

I have so much to give to you-

If you'd just put out your hands.

Would you rather feel nothing, than to take a risk?
Ease up baby. Relax those fists.

The damage may be done,
But I could aid you in making amends.